When I announced to my family that I had decided to stay single, there was an emotional uproar for a long time. They couldn’t understand my decision because they didn’t think such a decision existed.

It was simple — when you reach a certain age you go to school, then you go to college, then you get a job, and then you get married. There’s simply no choice in that matter. At least, that’s how it is presented to most of us.

So, when I made that choice, where a choice didn’t explicitly exist, everyone around me was bewildered.

There were a lot of ways in which my family tried to change my mind. First, there was emotional blackmail, a heavy dose of it. Then came a series of calls from my extended family, who thought they could change my mind through intrusive questioning. Even the neighbourhood aunties weighed in. They subtly told me how it was a bad idea to stay single, even though they were in unhappy marriages. And friends also discussed the idea with me with uncomfortable pauses.

During that phase, I didn’t meet a single person who thought it was a good idea to stay single and live life the way I wanted.

That’s when I realised that the idea of marriage was so deeply ingrained and constantly reinforced that people didn’t think that there was any other way of living a comfortable life. Or the idea that someone could challenge the notion of marriage, an age-old concept, something most people had to go through without questioning it, shook their core identity.

I don’t think marriage is inherently flawed. Marriage is deeply fulfilling for some people. It’s good for people who love to have that daily support, who love to have company, who want to grow alongside someone, who want to create a family, or to simply create a beautiful lifelong bond. It makes you feel safe and supported. It gives you a best friend for life. And of course, the romance aspect of it too.

But the idea that it works for everyone is a fallacy. The idea that it’s a natural progression in life is outdated. The idea that it’s the only way to live is preposterous.

From the outside, my choice may have looked rebellious. To me, it simply felt being honest. I was just choosing something that I felt was true to me.

Nowadays, when I read data and articles about how more and more people are choosing to stay single, I feel maybe I was ahead of my time. I was self-aware at a young age and was not scared to voice it.

I have noticed one thing when people discuss the idea of staying single, most people are scared of being alone because they don’t know what life would look like for them. And I understand that because we are all social beings and conditioned to have a partner.

But the honest truth is when I made that decision, even I didn’t have any idea what life would look like for me. Till that point in my life, I hadn’t known any person who was single by choice. I was the first person in my family and my circle to do so. But I knew myself well enough to know that if I made a choice, then I would be ready to face the unseen consequences, whatever it may be.

I was never scared. In fact, it was the opposite, I felt a strange sense of peace when I made that decision. I felt proud that my life, in every way, would be a result of my own choices. I knew that one day, when I looked back at my life, I would be proud of myself for being courageous, even when everyone around me was screaming that I was wrong.

We have one life to live and staying true to ourselves in whatever we do, whether that’s the profession we choose, the people we surround ourselves with, and the life decisions we make, is of utmost importance. And there’s something deeply freeing about it, even when the world struggles to understand it.